Trusting

I finally completed my re-reading of Life is Tough but God is Faithful by Sheila Walsh. It has been a VERY difficult book to read. Not that the words are hard to understand. She used simple understandable words. However, it's a book that caused me to search and dig my heart real deep on my love for God. Each time I pick up the book to read, I am bound to have tears welled up in my eyes. She is a speaker at the Women of Faith Conferences and creator of the popular Children of Faith Conferences. She wrote in humility on how she has learned through the many people whom she has rendered help. She wrote in humility also how tough life can be yet how God has shone His light on her path.

There are times when this huge blanket of negativity just plonk down on me. There are times when I wake up feeling that nothing will ever go right. There are times when I simply drag my feet to work. There are times when the day started right but the rest of the day is just one big wrong. There are times when things just simply don't work out for me. There are times when I don't feel like doing anything. There are times when I just want to hide in my room behind closed doors. There are times when I feel distant from God. There are times when I feel angry. There are times when I don't feel like responding to anybody.

Yet, it's in those times when I feel so "ugly" could I hear Jesus asking me what He asked Peter "Sandra, do you love me? Do you love me? Do you love me?" And I felt in my heart "HOW can I out-love God? HOW can I outgive God?"

I ask "God, can I trust you?"
God ask "Sandra, I know life is tough but can I trust you enough to trust that I am always faithful?"

- Heart rendered -