"Singapore has 3 seasons - Hot, More Hot and Very Hot".... Says Ps PN.
Today, went to Labrador Park, bunkers, canons, sea, walkway, etc..
Walk walk walk...
As I stand at the top of the hill looking down, I am amazed to see the beauty of God's creation as I looked at the vast sea.
It was interesting actually.
The feelings I went with today is totally different when I went with my own friends.
My colleagues are mostly "Aunties".. Hee...
I am blessed with a packet of lunch, water, biscuits, umbrella and fan...
Very very blessed to be taken care of by them..
*yawn*
Off to sleep.. Sun = Sleep!!
ZZzzzzzzZzzZzzzzz
Saturday, June 18, 2005
Friday, June 17, 2005
Ultra sad
As I try to make the best out of everything, I really can't help but feel that it's a DEEP battle within me.
I am trying to NOT feel sad. NOT feel frustrated. NOT feel sick of work.
YET, I am real downright frustrated!
Today then I realised that tomorrow I've a clinic walk to a Park!
Man!!!!!!!
I really can't help it but feel so bounded by work work work work!
And worst part is that I dun even have the "right" to say no...
In my performance appraisal, boss say "I want to see more of you in clinic events."
I ain't much of a person who likes to be "forced" to do things.
And the fact that it seemingly affect my appraisal makes me feel so sickening.
*sob*
Somehow, the struggle of loving and hating my job seems possible.
Somehow, I suddenly feel that loving and hating something at the same time is possible.
Then after that, I feel that it's such a struggle and tiring hating my job.
Asked myself "Hey.. why not just make the best out of it? You can get closer to your colleagues!!"
Then after awhile, my mood a bit better...
Then after awhile, my mood got worse again..
*sob**sob*
Guess that's the real world........... real working world....
I think it's time for me to go let out to God liao...
I am trying to NOT feel sad. NOT feel frustrated. NOT feel sick of work.
YET, I am real downright frustrated!
Today then I realised that tomorrow I've a clinic walk to a Park!
Man!!!!!!!
I really can't help it but feel so bounded by work work work work!
And worst part is that I dun even have the "right" to say no...
In my performance appraisal, boss say "I want to see more of you in clinic events."
I ain't much of a person who likes to be "forced" to do things.
And the fact that it seemingly affect my appraisal makes me feel so sickening.
*sob*
Somehow, the struggle of loving and hating my job seems possible.
Somehow, I suddenly feel that loving and hating something at the same time is possible.
Then after that, I feel that it's such a struggle and tiring hating my job.
Asked myself "Hey.. why not just make the best out of it? You can get closer to your colleagues!!"
Then after awhile, my mood a bit better...
Then after awhile, my mood got worse again..
*sob**sob*
Guess that's the real world........... real working world....
I think it's time for me to go let out to God liao...
Thursday, June 16, 2005
Oh what a Day!
One staff on leave.
One staff to another clinic.
One staff's daughter sick.
I became everything.
:) Sometimes, you just happen to get one of THOSE days where nothing simply falls into place.
Awhile later, I was told that there's another meeting at 730pm!
Gosh!! And I had a pre-arranged meeting with an old friend at 630pm..
Sometimes, I just feel SO irritated that my own life is disrupted.
Thank goodness he's willing to wait for me for dinner so... reluctantly, I dragged myself to the meeting.
At the end of it, I saw how wonderful God is..
My clinic closed at 5pm and from 5pm straight to 730pm, I had the opportunity to share my experience in my church camp with my colleague.
I had the opportunity to share God's love to her.
We had a good laugh.. and a real good time of sharing.
Though she's still very close, I am pretty sure that something would have spoken to her.
And guess what man!
The meeting started at 730pm. Eat and drink till 8pm and we (my company) shared the first 15mins and then we left already.
Haha... Looking back, it sounds real crazy to wait from 5pm to 730pm then meeting really start at 8pm then ended at 815pm... *grimace*
But like I said, God changed things around.
Then made my friend came, picked me up and we went to Changi Village for dinner.. LATE dinner.
By then, I already lost all appetite.. but still squeezed in a bottle of H20 and rojak..
Walked around the beach area, chatted a little, talked about the good old Sec Sch days, talk about life now, talk about life then, talk about life next...
Basically, walk walk walk... talk talk talk...
Halfway through, I sensed the Z-monster coming to pick me up.
Haha!
My eyes was so tired though physically, strength was still there...
ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Later.
One staff to another clinic.
One staff's daughter sick.
I became everything.
:) Sometimes, you just happen to get one of THOSE days where nothing simply falls into place.
Awhile later, I was told that there's another meeting at 730pm!
Gosh!! And I had a pre-arranged meeting with an old friend at 630pm..
Sometimes, I just feel SO irritated that my own life is disrupted.
Thank goodness he's willing to wait for me for dinner so... reluctantly, I dragged myself to the meeting.
At the end of it, I saw how wonderful God is..
My clinic closed at 5pm and from 5pm straight to 730pm, I had the opportunity to share my experience in my church camp with my colleague.
I had the opportunity to share God's love to her.
We had a good laugh.. and a real good time of sharing.
Though she's still very close, I am pretty sure that something would have spoken to her.
And guess what man!
The meeting started at 730pm. Eat and drink till 8pm and we (my company) shared the first 15mins and then we left already.
Haha... Looking back, it sounds real crazy to wait from 5pm to 730pm then meeting really start at 8pm then ended at 815pm... *grimace*
But like I said, God changed things around.
Then made my friend came, picked me up and we went to Changi Village for dinner.. LATE dinner.
By then, I already lost all appetite.. but still squeezed in a bottle of H20 and rojak..
Walked around the beach area, chatted a little, talked about the good old Sec Sch days, talk about life now, talk about life then, talk about life next...
Basically, walk walk walk... talk talk talk...
Halfway through, I sensed the Z-monster coming to pick me up.
Haha!
My eyes was so tired though physically, strength was still there...
ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Later.
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
Kingdom First Living 2005
It's the 2nd day after the camp and my mind is still SO filled with the camp!
There's so much that I have learnt and there's so much that I have taken back with me.
This year, I went to the camp having totally different atmosphere in my heart.
My Unit met up at Kranji MRT station to make our way in...
Guess what.. That morning, I woke up REAL early!
I was SO excited for the camp... that I woke up at 6am!! Then lazed around my bed till the time I was suppose to wake up.
When I scanned the EzLink to get to the train, there was this sudden feeling of freshness and I wonder "Hmm.. Why is today so different from every other day?"
Ah...!! That day I wasn't going to work!
Then I start to think further - Should I really drag myself to work?
Anyway... That aside, YES! All was on time and we made our way in..
Reached Eden about 945am and went for our BREAKFAST!
We headed straight for Teh Tarik, Mee Rebus, Roti Prata, etc..
Boy!! Did we eat!
Well... After that, some went for some supermarket shopping and some went back to the hotel.
Me for one, decided to stay indoors that day...
Hanged around the hotel, waiting around for the time to come to start...
Click click click...
I was so amazed by how things improve over the years..
This year's camp's deco was fantastic!
The camp booklet was EVEN more fantastic!
Kudos to the deco team and Tommy the designer who designed the poster, etc..
It was FANTASTIC!
"Why am I in a CG that is always taking photo??!!"
That's what my CL always "complain"..
Haha!! Well.. Can't help it.. We love taking photos.. we love taking down those pictures that will bring us down memory lane... and sometimes can still SMILE back and say "Thank God for those wonderful times.."
And sometimes... Being small sized doesn't REALLY help that much either... Always at the target of being carried, swinged, etc..
But well!! I must say it was a real good wake up swing and real cool fun!
CG devotion on the first morning was good.. (At least to me.:))
We heard a song that helped us dwell on His faithfulness. Season by season, He will always remain faithful to us.
I helped out at HopeKids this year.
The kids were SO fantastic that it brought me to tears...
My time with them was only a short while for about an hour.
Yet, EACH time I see them, my heart melts...
Through them, I CAN see the wonders of what the family group is doing.
They are raising Godly children!!!
And it's a job that is REALLY tough!
And I saw how the teachers gave their all to teach the kids and HOW they enjoyed it despite them being sick.
Some teached, some acted.
The kids just sat amazed..
Indeed, 3 cheers to all the teachers!!!
The adults teachings were fantastic as well!!
Ps PN's Amen and Hallelujah still rings in my head!
We cannot say "Mmmm...!! We must say "Amen"! Amen?"
Haha...
Was it the first night? Or was it the 2nd?
Well.. I responded to Missions.
This time, I really took alot of courage to go up on stage.
I was telling myself - That's it. Once up there, I MUST be committed to it. No more time to procrastinate. If it's God's will, God will open doors! I just have to obey.
I guess.. it's a wake up call to me again to stop procrastinating.
Throughout the camp, I have so much in my head.
This year, God reminded me of His faithfulness.
I was reminded on how God has blessed me when I decided to put down my worldly wants last church camp.
Since then, I was blessed with friends, blessed with a better family atmosphere, blessed with a job, blessed with my studies and lots more...
Indeed, no one can outdo God.
God is the ultimate and no one can ever replace that.
Kingdom Living really starts in our heart.
It brought me back to that day when I entered the gantry to the train and asked myself "Why did I drag myself to work?"
Yeah... I should actually be dragging.. I should be rejoicing!
God has called us to different areas of work for a purpose.
Not forgetting that this year, I have the opportunity to share MY life testimony on how I accept God into my life.
It never NEVER fail to refresh me when I affirm the goodness of God in my life..
And this year, my group was privilege to have a brother who is visually handicapped.
When I conversed with him, I was totally touched...
And I was absolutely ashamed of myself.
Here I am pin-pointing at how "terrible" life is YET never thankful all the time for the goodness He has given me.
This is YET another wake up call...
Haha!! Church camps are always the "Wake Up Call" time...
And Church camps will always be a time where I always feel close to Church.
When I watched groups by groups going up to the stage for a photo taking session with Ps Ben & Ps Dinah, Ps LO and Pat, I felt so glad to be part of this family.
Tears just drop when I watched the various groups that auditioned for the Talent Night.
I was thinking "My gosh.. We are REALLY that talented!!"
Reminded me that God has made each and everyone of us SO unique...
To different people, He gives different talents and giftings... And we are here AS a family, to help one another to lift each other up.
I totally enjoyed my CG...
Heee... My CG is really made up of different profession and people with different loves and dislikes.
Yet... through it ALL, God is the cornerstone of it, lifting us up.
Yet... through it ALL, we help see each other through.
We fall... and we learn.. and we grow.
Camp Objectives?
Totally met!
Ps Jeff said that during the camp, our sinful nature dropped alot!
And a camp is like heaven brought down to us.
Then I got it all figured out!
NO wonder I dun feel like going home!
Cause Heaven's too wonderful a place to let go!
This really helped me lots to see that my life on earth is just a passing phase and I have to LIVE it out for Christ in this ONE life...
Christ is WORTH it!! Isn't He? *wink*
No doubt.
Oh ya..
Not forgetting that I was welcomed by my dog who disturbed me while I was unpacking!
There's so much that I have learnt and there's so much that I have taken back with me.
This year, I went to the camp having totally different atmosphere in my heart.
My Unit met up at Kranji MRT station to make our way in...
Guess what.. That morning, I woke up REAL early!
I was SO excited for the camp... that I woke up at 6am!! Then lazed around my bed till the time I was suppose to wake up.
When I scanned the EzLink to get to the train, there was this sudden feeling of freshness and I wonder "Hmm.. Why is today so different from every other day?"
Ah...!! That day I wasn't going to work!
Then I start to think further - Should I really drag myself to work?
Anyway... That aside, YES! All was on time and we made our way in..
Reached Eden about 945am and went for our BREAKFAST!
We headed straight for Teh Tarik, Mee Rebus, Roti Prata, etc..
Boy!! Did we eat!
Well... After that, some went for some supermarket shopping and some went back to the hotel.
Me for one, decided to stay indoors that day...
Hanged around the hotel, waiting around for the time to come to start...
Click click click...
I was so amazed by how things improve over the years..
This year's camp's deco was fantastic!
The camp booklet was EVEN more fantastic!
Kudos to the deco team and Tommy the designer who designed the poster, etc..
It was FANTASTIC!
"Why am I in a CG that is always taking photo??!!"
That's what my CL always "complain"..
Haha!! Well.. Can't help it.. We love taking photos.. we love taking down those pictures that will bring us down memory lane... and sometimes can still SMILE back and say "Thank God for those wonderful times.."
And sometimes... Being small sized doesn't REALLY help that much either... Always at the target of being carried, swinged, etc..
But well!! I must say it was a real good wake up swing and real cool fun!
CG devotion on the first morning was good.. (At least to me.:))
We heard a song that helped us dwell on His faithfulness. Season by season, He will always remain faithful to us.
I helped out at HopeKids this year.
The kids were SO fantastic that it brought me to tears...
My time with them was only a short while for about an hour.
Yet, EACH time I see them, my heart melts...
Through them, I CAN see the wonders of what the family group is doing.
They are raising Godly children!!!
And it's a job that is REALLY tough!
And I saw how the teachers gave their all to teach the kids and HOW they enjoyed it despite them being sick.
Some teached, some acted.
The kids just sat amazed..
Indeed, 3 cheers to all the teachers!!!
The adults teachings were fantastic as well!!
Ps PN's Amen and Hallelujah still rings in my head!
We cannot say "Mmmm...!! We must say "Amen"! Amen?"
Haha...
Was it the first night? Or was it the 2nd?
Well.. I responded to Missions.
This time, I really took alot of courage to go up on stage.
I was telling myself - That's it. Once up there, I MUST be committed to it. No more time to procrastinate. If it's God's will, God will open doors! I just have to obey.
I guess.. it's a wake up call to me again to stop procrastinating.
Throughout the camp, I have so much in my head.
This year, God reminded me of His faithfulness.
I was reminded on how God has blessed me when I decided to put down my worldly wants last church camp.
Since then, I was blessed with friends, blessed with a better family atmosphere, blessed with a job, blessed with my studies and lots more...
Indeed, no one can outdo God.
God is the ultimate and no one can ever replace that.
Kingdom Living really starts in our heart.
It brought me back to that day when I entered the gantry to the train and asked myself "Why did I drag myself to work?"
Yeah... I should actually be dragging.. I should be rejoicing!
God has called us to different areas of work for a purpose.
Not forgetting that this year, I have the opportunity to share MY life testimony on how I accept God into my life.
It never NEVER fail to refresh me when I affirm the goodness of God in my life..
And this year, my group was privilege to have a brother who is visually handicapped.
When I conversed with him, I was totally touched...
And I was absolutely ashamed of myself.
Here I am pin-pointing at how "terrible" life is YET never thankful all the time for the goodness He has given me.
This is YET another wake up call...
Haha!! Church camps are always the "Wake Up Call" time...
And Church camps will always be a time where I always feel close to Church.
When I watched groups by groups going up to the stage for a photo taking session with Ps Ben & Ps Dinah, Ps LO and Pat, I felt so glad to be part of this family.
Tears just drop when I watched the various groups that auditioned for the Talent Night.
I was thinking "My gosh.. We are REALLY that talented!!"
Reminded me that God has made each and everyone of us SO unique...
To different people, He gives different talents and giftings... And we are here AS a family, to help one another to lift each other up.
I totally enjoyed my CG...
Heee... My CG is really made up of different profession and people with different loves and dislikes.
Yet... through it ALL, God is the cornerstone of it, lifting us up.
Yet... through it ALL, we help see each other through.
We fall... and we learn.. and we grow.
Camp Objectives?
Totally met!
Ps Jeff said that during the camp, our sinful nature dropped alot!
And a camp is like heaven brought down to us.
Then I got it all figured out!
NO wonder I dun feel like going home!
Cause Heaven's too wonderful a place to let go!
This really helped me lots to see that my life on earth is just a passing phase and I have to LIVE it out for Christ in this ONE life...
Christ is WORTH it!! Isn't He? *wink*
No doubt.
Oh ya..
Not forgetting that I was welcomed by my dog who disturbed me while I was unpacking!
Monday, June 06, 2005
Quick updates!
Did this rather cute personality test last week and found that "hey! it's quite "me"!!"
These few days, I seem to be receiving lots of test that test me on my personality...
Quite interesting actually... cause it helps me know myself JUST a tiny weeny bitsy bit more.. Hee...
Give it a try.. At least for me, it comes close to what I think I am..
http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/mind/surveys/whatamilike/
Nurturer is what I get..
Hmm... Pretty close actually.. Rather introvert kind of person.
And usually care enough for others.
As for facts.. Still quite a question mark cause it says that the person is practical.
*scratch head*
Yes oh yes.. A planner!!
Sometimes, friends simply tahan me cause I just plan.
Plan... and plan AND plan.. Haha!
Sometimes it's through doing simple test, knowing yourself, then will I know where am I in lack.
BUT, the good news is, as I told my friend that "It's ok.. Whatever that you are not, God will always provide in some other ways, forms and methods.."
Isn't that amazing?
Well.. after all, we just ain't perfect.
Oooh man!! And finally!!!
Tomorrow we are going to get our NG2A2 T-shirt!
A round of applause for Myrna!! **clap clap clap**
She did SUCH a marvellous design for our shirt..
This birthed from our CG's anchor verse John 12:24
"I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds."
Yupz.. How can the dream come through for the seed to be a tree/plant unless it dies to itself and THEN can growth take place.
Can't wait to see the end product.
*chuckle*
Woah.. I feel like I am doing a WHOLE week's update!!!
Over the weekend, I built up my shelf, packed my room.
Suddenly feel like I am in a totally new room.
Gone is the mess...
BUT!!! There still is lots to do... So far, it's just looking nice from the outside.
I still need to pack wardrobe, change curtain rod, change curtain, repair broken clock, paint wall, etc...
*tsk*.. I think I need to go into PackingRoom Part X!!!
Yesterday was only Part III... *grimace*
However, tonight will simply just a stay home, look good, prepare for camp night...
Read a book, watch some TV, listen to music and SLEEP early!!
Okie dokie for now.. Be back REFRESHED after the church camp!!
These few days, I seem to be receiving lots of test that test me on my personality...
Quite interesting actually... cause it helps me know myself JUST a tiny weeny bitsy bit more.. Hee...
Give it a try.. At least for me, it comes close to what I think I am..
http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/mind/surveys/whatamilike/
Nurturer is what I get..
Hmm... Pretty close actually.. Rather introvert kind of person.
And usually care enough for others.
As for facts.. Still quite a question mark cause it says that the person is practical.
*scratch head*
Yes oh yes.. A planner!!
Sometimes, friends simply tahan me cause I just plan.
Plan... and plan AND plan.. Haha!
Sometimes it's through doing simple test, knowing yourself, then will I know where am I in lack.
BUT, the good news is, as I told my friend that "It's ok.. Whatever that you are not, God will always provide in some other ways, forms and methods.."
Isn't that amazing?
Well.. after all, we just ain't perfect.
Oooh man!! And finally!!!
Tomorrow we are going to get our NG2A2 T-shirt!
A round of applause for Myrna!! **clap clap clap**
She did SUCH a marvellous design for our shirt..
This birthed from our CG's anchor verse John 12:24
"I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds."
Yupz.. How can the dream come through for the seed to be a tree/plant unless it dies to itself and THEN can growth take place.
Can't wait to see the end product.
*chuckle*
Woah.. I feel like I am doing a WHOLE week's update!!!
Over the weekend, I built up my shelf, packed my room.
Suddenly feel like I am in a totally new room.
Gone is the mess...
BUT!!! There still is lots to do... So far, it's just looking nice from the outside.
I still need to pack wardrobe, change curtain rod, change curtain, repair broken clock, paint wall, etc...
*tsk*.. I think I need to go into PackingRoom Part X!!!
Yesterday was only Part III... *grimace*
However, tonight will simply just a stay home, look good, prepare for camp night...
Read a book, watch some TV, listen to music and SLEEP early!!
Okie dokie for now.. Be back REFRESHED after the church camp!!
Thursday, June 02, 2005
**anticipation**
For the past 2 weeks, I have these 2 words running around my head - "Refiner's Fire"...
For silver to be refined and purified, the silversmith have to hold that silver in hot fire.
Only by looking at the silver and seeing his image in it will the silversmith know if the silver's refined.
Just felt so encouraged...
Cause in Malachi 3:3, it says "He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver."
I felt so encouraged cause, liken the silver, despite the discouragement that we have to go through in life's journey, we can KNOW that God's eyes is always looking at us.
Had a VERY eventful day today...
I couldn't sleep last night cause I kept thinking "Hmm.. what will the auditors ask me?"
Guess.. being one of the key staff in the clinic has its pressures..
As I was praying last night, I really didn't know what to pray for...
Pray for wisdom such that I can answer?
Or pray that the auditors won't choose my clinic to audit??
In the end, I pray for peace..
Cause I know that if I have God in my life, I can claim that victory..
Finally I slept soundly... :)
Then this morning in my shower, I SUDDENLY remembered that today, 2pm, is my release of exams results.
Suddenly, I was SO filled with anticipation!!!
It's been quite some time that I felt such feelings..!
Maybe cause this semester, I really had put in alot of effort.
Maybe cause this semester, I felt that I have really learnt.
Heee... as you can guessed..., 1:15pm.. 1:20pm.. 1:31pm..
I wonder.. why is time so slow when I want it to be fast?
2pm finally came and I got a wonderful gift!!
It's better than I expected!
I remember my mother always tell me this..
"When you do your best, God will do the rest. Dun worry."
Indeed, this semester, I was really challenged in the area of managing my time..
With a new job.. 2 exams.. I do wonder if I can perform better than last year when I was jobless..
But God is faithful. :)
Oh ya oh ya!
Another great thing is that the auditors didn't choose my clinic to audit!Haha!!!
Honestly, I learnt something through this...
For the past 3 weeks, we were so busy preparing for this audit AS IF the auditors were coming.
I start to think... "Hey, as believers of Christ, are we preparing ourselves? Are we gearing ourselves? Are we equipping ourselves?"
This Sunday, Ps spoke about the church being the bride for the groom..
And if a bride takes a year to prepare to look her prettiest at her wedding, are we preparing ourselves to look pretty too?
Hee... Lots of thoughts..
Just dunno how to pen ALL down.. Haha!
Dun mind me man... I am just flowing all thoughts out..
Now, I only have ONE thought!!!
What should I have for breakfast tomorrow?
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