Then & now

Monday was THE day.
The day that I met our new believer to do a 24-hr follow up with her.
Along with me, or rather, I tagged along with Nelson and Eugene.
It was a session that TILL NOW, still remains vivid in my mind.

It has been a long time that I actually did a "hands-on" with a new believer.
When I made my way to Kovan from Pasir Ris, there I was sitting upper deck in bus 81 thinking how will the session later be like, what should I share, how will she react, will she change her mind, etc...
I decided that the best way to assure her salvation was to share my own testimony.
So then, I prepared what I want to share and I shared.

After sharing, went home feeling all so perked up!
It's amazing how personal testimony can perk a person up.
I guess... it's really about how thankful we can be...
As we share our life testimony, we are recalling God's goodness in our lives.
When I went home, I continue to recall His goodness in MY life.

Ironically, memories starts to fill my mind..
I start to walk my memory lane thinking about my own life.
And I noticed that in my life, there are MANY turning points... BUT there is 3 major ones.

1st - 14 yrs old
I gave my life to Christ for the VERY first time ever since I attended Sunday School days at age 5.
I spent 12 years in a Methodist church till I was asked by my tuition teacher to try out her charismatic church. I visited when I was 13yrs old and at 14, I gave my life. Perhaps it was the different style of the church. The music, the worship, etc... captivated young little me.
I started to serve fervantly...
But maybe I was too young, I got disappointed easily too...

Then, I started to seek for love in all the wrong places, I fell into not-so-good company and I fell into a bad relationship.
Feeling ashamed, I decided to give God a break thinking that perhaps, God wasn't too pleased with me.

I left church at 17yrs old. 18yrs got into yet another r/s which I thought "Hey..this one can marry!"

Life after 20 was quite a havoc one.
Partying was THE thing for me.
Every week, ladies nights, saturday nights, never fail to attract my friend and me to go and have fun.
Mind you: It wasn't to know guys. We were just happy dancing together. Haha!! Yeah! 2 crazy gals with boyfriends overseas mah...

R/s ended when I was 23yrs old.
Life was devastating.
No doubt, I thought that it's easier to end it all.
But the stronger part of me WANTS to survive.
Heee.. and so, I survive...
But I was VERY lost. I was seeking directions.
I was seeking for a hope.

2nd - 19/08/01
At 24 yrs old (not the above date), I made a decision...
That if I want to find hope, I better look for it.
I decided, GO OVERSEAS!
Haha!!!! What an escapist I was!

Anyway, I left Singapore happily and went Brisbane.

I think God has funny ways of bringing His people back to Him.
For me, He has to bring me to Brisbane.
One Saturday night, after many days of crying, I remembered that God said in Jer 29:11 that He has plans for me. He has plans TO prosper me.
I picked up the phone and called a schoolmate cause I remember he asked me if I was a believer as I was wearing my cross.

Amazingly, the Hope Brisbane was just a 15mins walk, 5mins drive away.
I went.
The first sermon Ps Wilson spoke was forgiveness.
Then, I realised I was holding on to SO much bitterness and so much unforgiveness on myself.
That was when God slowly entered into my life again.

I remembered that I told God "God, help me to let go. I want your love in my life again."
My life took a change...
By and by, I noticed that I want to know more about God again.
Coincidentally, while I was packing my luggage, I packed my bible in as well.
God DOES has a plan for me!

The more I want to know God, the more I grew to love Him.
On 19/08/01, I rededicated my life to Him again.

Never looked back.
Never regretted.

3rd - 05/06/04
Church camp last year changed my life again.
Before the camp, I was in despair or rather, I stupidly placed myself in situations which allows depression to seep into my life.
But last year's camp helped me see His love in my life.
After going so many rounds, I CAN'T deny His existance in my life.
How can I deny it after what He has showered on me?

What I learned you ask?
I learned that God really has plans for us.
Life as a Christian is really like what Apostle Paul says "A race".
A race.
In a long distance race, many will fall away due to tiredness or even due to lack of trust that there is an ending point.
Keep the faith.
Hold it strong.
Stop thinking with our logical minds.
Put faith instead.

God is a God of wonders and He works in ways that we can't fathom.
As I look back at my life, I begin to see that God is indeed my Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end.
He's behind me, He's before me.
He's ever my Lord.

=)
Just sharing.