S.I.A.N

"I am sian of doing such stuffs"

In a span of 5 days, I have heard several people telling me this statement - "I am sian of doing such stuffs". Mothers, friends & students alike.

Honestly, my heart will feel some kind of ache when I hear that statement. I often find that at at stage, it means also the simple fact that "I am going to give up soon. I don't want to persevere any longer."

Today, I went and re-looked at my organization vision. It has a GREAT HUGE vision - To reach out to EVERY youth in Sg..... Hey.. it's not 50 or 500 or 5000 but my heads in my organization has an idea to reach out to EVERY youths in Singapore. In line with this, I was reminded by Hope's (my church) vision. "To fulful the Great Commission in our lifetime by building strong and biblical churches in Singapore and ALL over the world". Remembering when I came back to Singapore back in 2002, me and a few overseas grads met up with our pastor and he shared "The power of an Idea" that led him to Sg to plant a church.

See, it's an idea that drove my organization to where it is now. It's an idea of reaching to ALL over the world that led people to move to other countries. It is from an idea that led to an application and to living it out. It never was meant to be easy. Perservering is always hard. Halfway through we will get "S.I.A.N." big time. There are times where I wonder too - Why do I have to go through this? It's so sian. Why?

I have learned over the years and am still learning to go back to that idea that started everything. To me, it likens to an analogy of a crossroad. At that X-road, I make the decision. I think and I decide. At the point of decision, I will take that step and walk forward. When I get stuck along the path, I try my best to go back to that X-road junction and ask myself - Why did I make that decision despite so many other choices? And that, will help push me forward. So, therefore, I see it so very important now to make solid and Godly decisions. Then there is a "basis" where I can stand on to "justify" for myself on why I do what I am doing.

Perserverance as quoted from a book is this - Capacity to bear up under difficult circumstances, not with a passive complacency, but with a hopeful fortitude that actively resists weariness and defeat." Gosh.. BIG word heh? No wonder making Godly decision is just so very important. Just gotta pray for that Capacity.

Ok ok.. I think I am blah-ing too much. Too much thoughts after work. Will need to download to God after this.. Meanwhile, it's yet another GREAT and tiring day but it'll be a GREATER day tomorrow!! Nights...